I am sitting here recovering from my recent surgery. Meanwhile many of my coworkers are covering for me as I heal. They are handling my calls and my reports among other tasks that they so willingly step in to take care of. And how does it affect me? I am wallowing in guilt. Guilt for not being there. Guilt for the poor timing of this surgery. We as an office are going through a very large and work intensive broker dealer change. And here I am, sitting at home recuperating.
It was fortunate that my daughter is experiencing car trouble and tonight I drove her around to her appointment. It was fortunate because I got to listen to her tell me how guilty she was feeling. It seems her coworkers and her boyfriend are taking care of her while she is without her car. I could write an entire blog piece on the value of wisdom gained in conversations with our children but I’ll save that for another time. The pearl of wisdom is the realization of what is really happening here.
When we allow others to step in when we can’t, we get to witness the actions of people who care for us. In truth, our inability to perform our tasks gives them the chance to show that they do care about us and at the same time we give them the opportunity to demonstrate their worth as a coworker.
I have always been a responsible person and as such could not imagine making others do my work. To that end I can pride myself in seldom if ever missing work but now, thanks to my daughter, I see that I may have just been depriving people of their opportunity to step in. It is still not easy for me to shed this guilt, but in this new light, some of my anxiety has decreased.
If there is a moral here, it is to trust others and accept their willingness to help out. Accept it for what it is, a gift. Savor the gift, appreciate their efforts and try just a little, to shed some of your guilt.
This really strikes true for me! I remember that I had to learn to delegate to my coworkers rather then rushing to do it myself. I had excellent IV skills and would immediately start all the nurses IV’s for them and they never had a chance to develop their own skill. Now I often feel like I have to carry all the burden because there are many things Horst can’t do and feel guilty when others offer to help. After reading this I will rethink my response to others. Let caring people care.
Thank you for reading and for having it fit into your own circumstances. It means a lot to me when something I write can move someone else. Horst is always on my mind and hope all still is progressing toward a recovery.